Radio "Voice of the Wasteland"
Hello there, survivors! “Voice of the Wasteland” is here once again — the only radio in the Valley that your old receivers can tune into. Valla and Porcupine are at the microphone, which means that two bright suns lit up this morning. Just like your apocalypse prediction, huh, Valla?
While she curses me for this joke, let's get started, brothers and sisters!
In today's edition:
- There's a quarantine in the Wasteland, and there are just more cars. How does it even work?
- Meet Tango-1, our old colleague.
So here we are. I'm on my way around to get cactus juice, and BAM! Got caught in traffic. Imagine that. Postapocalypse! Traffic! There have been more armoured cars than the eye can see. By the way, some of those you literally can't see!
I go out to the tent to buy three litres, and there is a procession of masks. Two meters apart. It's not a whole 30-man masquerade, and it's just for the juice. Well, at least everyone cares about their health, thank the carburettor.
— The world is enveloped by an evil disease, together, but separately, we can defeat it.
All right… That one… didn't really work out. Protect your health, dear listeners, and we will continue.
Me and my war buddy were sitting chewing on iguana ribs yesterday, and he told me in confidence. Guess it's not really a secret any more. Since I told you.
There was a younger boy in our unit, I was finishing my service then, and he just arrived. And so I noticed him right away. It was clear that this guy would get far. Not a human — a machine. Organized, powerful, and serious, like a fireman when you joke about a fire extinguisher.
So the devil resurfaced. Nobody knows where he was and what he did, but he promised to come to say hello soon. Oh, I got a picture too!
— His burden is heavy. And even though his eyes are closed, I see in them the purest light of the soul.
Don't get your hopes up, Valla, he doesn't care about romance. He's an old soldier and doesn't know the words of love. Except for the call sign, Tango. However, he denies that such a dance existed. So I advise you not to joke about it.
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For today it’s all the news that we managed to find out. Stay tuned to our radio!